[This is cross-posted from SocialKink.com, where my husband (Master) writes the Quips and Chains blogs as well as articles like this one. Check out Social Kink after you read this for more articles and really intelligent forums/interviews/profiles. You can make friends with Two Knotty Boys, Steve Diet Goedde, Fetish Pervert, Michelle Aston, January Seraph, and all of the rest of my friends. You can also see pictures of me that are not located here.]

This is one of those times where I find myself faced with a choice between being popular, and being true to my convictions. One thing about me, I despise dogmatic thinking. Absolute statements delivered as absolute Fact/Truth are absolutely abhorrent to me. I would venture a guess that such rigid, I’m absolutely right/you’re absolutely wrong thinking has caused more harm than pornography and meat eating combined.

Two articles on the dangers of pornography were forwarded to me on the same day. They both are from the site AlterNet.

The first, Liberal Denial: The Link Between Porno and War is by Rian Eisler, and it is as slanted and biased as something penned by Bill O’Reilly or David Duke. Here is the opening line of her article:

Liberals often defend images of men chaining, whipping, torturing, and even killing women in the name of sexual pleasure as harmless exercises of free speech.

We do? Wow. Ms. Eisler must have some mighty thorough and compelling data to back up that blanket assertion. She is, after all, in the academy. I read the Chalice and the Blade in college. I am troubled by the certainty, and authority with which she speaks. She doesn’t communicate. She dictates. That’s what dictators do, and they think they’re absolutely right too. This isn’t an article. It’s a polemic.

The second article in question is Pornography and the End of Masculinity, by Don Hazen.

Chances are, if you’re reading this article on Social Kink, you’re probably fairly progressive minded. But the thing is, ideals exist not on a line, but along a circumference. You can be libertarian, but if you go too far in, you’re anarchic or even fascist. It’s like walking to the North Pole. If you walk too far north, you’ll end up walking south without even realizing it.

I think the question of pornography in liberalism/feminism is like the question of evil in Abrahamic theology. It’s a biggie, and like the stuck couch in Dirk Gently’s stairwell, it doesn’t look like it can be answered with breaking down a wall.

Here’s the problem I see. When we speak in absolute terms about things that (brace yourself) seems to be mainly a matter of opinion, then people tend to get upset. When people are upset, people tend to stop listening, and start arguing. There is a mode of speech, called E Prime, which eliminates the forms of the verb to be. Here some direct quotes taken from the two articles in question. Note the use of absolute terms, making each statement a declaration of fact, not an opinion, or a thesis, or a probability. No. These authors are in the same boat as Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly, and Jerry Falwell. Those who know that they are absolutely right… can feel justified to do or say anything. Take a look at these direct quotes:

• Porno vilifies and harms women. (Eisler)
• Pornography is about linking sexual arousal with the infliction or suffering of pain - be it psychological or physical. (Hazen)
• Liberals often defend images of men chaining, whipping, torturing, and even killing women in the name of sexual pleasure as harmless exercises of free speech. (bold face added by author) (Eisler)

Now really. This is a fetish site. Some of us do enjoy power games, and inflicting, or receiving pain. The motto of the BDSM/Fetish world is Safe, Sane, and Consensual. Free will matters. Are there women in porn who are troubled? Of course. Are there women who are exploited? Well, what does exploited mean? It’s a powerful word with no fixed borders. I work in porn. I’m a fetish writer. The women I work with are uniformly smart, empowered, and together. I recently interviewed Michelle Aston, for a forthcoming piece to be published here. I asked her point blank about the treatment of women in the industry. Here is her complete, unedited response:

It’s mostly bad, but then women let themselves be treated badly. Women rule the industry, all they have to do is put their foot down and not take less than what they deserve. Pussy rules the world and has throughout the ages. I never had to flash my tits for beer, but if I needed to, I would and enjoy every minute of it.

She sounds pretty empowered to me. Also, Ms. Aston has an advanced degree in Neuroscience, and chooses to work in the adult industry. Is she brainwashed? Has she been conditioned to obey and kowtow to the libidinous lustings of men? Or has she decided that her body is her own, and she is allowed to use it as she wills?

What we seem to have here is a War of Orthodoxies. It doesn’t seem to be about choice at all, but rather about who’s ideology should rule. Sounds like patriarchy has decided to cross dress.

“Meet the new boss. Same as the old boss.”

Someday humanity will advance beyond either/or thinking. Someday sex won’t be a commodity, but a simple act. Someday women, men, and any other permutation thereof will not play these silly games over who controls what you do, say, or think.

Someday. But not yet.

For more information about E Prime and General Semantics, go here.

Tags: BDSM, Marky D. Sade //